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11.16.2011

Still Moving....Just in a Different Direction.

Well, my only hope is that after you read this, you don't think to yourself, "Man, that girl is crazy!" because quite honestly, over the last few days I have had that thought cross my mind a few times but within an instant of  a prayer I am able to be reassured I am not crazy....just obedient!

So for a quick recap - A few months ago I did some examining of my life and decided I had reached a plateau - I was not moving forward or backwards just at a standstill. So, I decided to make some changes...one of those being moving to the beach. The way I saw it was like this - I love the beach, I miss the beach when I am not there and I know that is where I want to be when I "grow up" so why would I not just go there now and start getting everything set up and ready for my "happily ever after" that I had decided for myself.
In my playbook - I moved to the beach, got a job, made some more friends, met a man, fell in love, got married, had children and never looked back. Sounds like a good plan to me, still does actually, except for one thing.....In the excitement and thrill of bringing my playbook to life I somehow lost sight of who the real Author is. No worries - He has quickly reminded me!

On Sunday, October 23 exactly 25 days before I pack up the moving truck and head it out of here God threw me a curve ball....He opened a door that takes me to where my real focus should be....not just towards my happily ever after but towards Him. Within a week after that Sunday night I began to feel strong hesitations about moving but brushed them off as cold feet and told myself over and over I was doing the right thing and to keep on moving forward, not really realizing I was actually moving backwards.
That next weekend, I remember driving to the beach for an interview and I turned my radio down and I started crying and I said, "God! Why did you put this door there right now?!  I have asked for this door for years,and you haven't shown up, so why now?! Why show up now, when I have everything in order and figured out! I don't want it there make it a wall!" but He didn't listen, instead He opened it even wider! So wide that no matter which way I turned it seemed I faced that same door.

So finally, this past Sunday exactly six days before I head off to the beach I was in church and the preacher said, "Always choose the path that takes you closer to God's face rather than away from" so that night I called both of my parents and told them what I had been dealing with and resisting and told them I just didn't think moving at this point is the path that takes me towards God's face - but that I also did not understand why God had opened all of these other doors that lead me to the beach either - my parents both said the same thing to me in very similar ways - "Faith, YOU opened those doors, you went after what YOU wanted and YOU got it - you went YOUR way, you have free will and you chose to use it but now what you are seeing is God sitting back, saying. 'Way to go Faith-I am glad you are getting what YOU want...BUT here is what I want for you!"
After the talks with my parents and a few other amazing, amazing, amazing, supportive friends I decided to close the doors I opened and walk through the one that was opened for me, not by me.

I have no doubt in my mind that God opened this door to keep me right here in Rock Hill for a little while longer, maybe forever, maybe for a month, maybe for a week. I also believe that God may have opened that just as God opened that door, He could just as easily shut it back and open a new one - of course that would be discouraging to me but it would also be on the path that He wants for me so I have to understand that. I have to hide the words of Jeremiah 29:11 in my heart so that I never forget even in the times when He shuts doors!

All in all, my hope in relocating was that I could experience some movement, little did I know that it didn't take moving away from somewhere to feel some movement in my life but rather, moving toward someone -towards His face!



xoxo,
Faith

11.11.2011

Faith > Fear

Ahhhhhhhhhhh.....It is finally sinking in that in a little over one week my drivers license will say Myrtle Beach SC again! I always knew I had awesome friends but hearing their kind words of "goodbye" have made me truly realize not just how blessed I am but that this really is happening!
It definitely is sinking in! I told my mom just this morning that I am getting cold feet but that I was prepared for that so I will be OK!

I saw a quote a  few weeks ago and in talking to my mom today it came to mind - "She paused, but never looked back." - This reminds me that it is OK to be scared, but just not to lose myself in the fear - it is OK to pause as long as I remember that I am just pausing to catch my breath!


xoxo,

Faith

11.07.2011

Dropping my Anchor!

You know how you hear and even say words all of the time but then something happens and you don't only hear it or speak but you feel it; you gain a true understanding....I am experiencing that right now as I type this post - I am understanding the emotion of  what Mr. Webster defines as bittersweet!

After much prayer, consideration and God opening doors AND windows to give me the push I needed and the courage I needed it is with bittersweet emotion that I share with you where these openings lead me to!
By the end of this month, I will be relocating back to good old Horry County!

I cannot say enough times how much I will miss the friendships that I have made in the last few years while here but I am very excited to be returning to friendships as well! I have met some amazing people along the way and have had opportunities that I possibly never would have had, had I not been where I am now.
They say, sometimes you have to leave to know where you need to be which is why I did not say goodbye forever to the beach when I left and the same reason I will not say goodbye forever to Rock Hill.

This is a major decision and  I feel so fortunate to have this opportunity. I am going into this with my eyes wide open knowing that there are going to be days ahead where I am going to miss a few of you and my family more than I do every other day and I am going to think that I must have lost my mind but I also feel like if your next step sometimes doesn't scare you....it isn't big enough!

Thank you all for your prayers as I embrace this new adventure...I am so excited and cannot wait to look back in 50 years and see how each step lead me down Gods path for my life! In the meantime you can find me on  here questioning and gaining understanding along the way!!

xoxo,

Faith

11.03.2011

Grace

“Grace is the face that love wears when it meets imperfection.” ~Joseph R. Cooke