Embarrassing Bravery

A friend sent me a text this week telling me to check out a video clip that he had found to be inspirational and thought that I would also enjoy it….it sure is great to have friends who know me so well-this short video clip was just the inspiration I needed!

You can view the video below but to sum it up it is a clip from the movie We Bought a Zoo (which I must see now!) where a man giving advice regarding a little boys love life but the words he says can be used in every other aspect of life as well. He tells this kid that “20 seconds of insane courage, 20 seconds of embarrassing bravery will always lead to something good”.

This got me thinking…he was right – as embarrassing as something may feel, in the end something good will come out of it. Maybe not right that moment but if we look back at all of the times we took advantage of those “20 second courageous moments” we will be able to see how those 20 seconds got us to where we are. We can also see how not using these 20 seconds to our full advantage regardless of how silly we may feel at the time will in some way down the road, also impact our life.

We have all heard the Eleanor Roosevelt quote, “Do one thing every day that scares you.” to me that has always meant I should drive a few miles over the speed limit, go skydiving, swim with the sharks….things along those lines. However, this quote found new meaning with me about two months ago when I had a customer at my desk. We were finishing his paperwork up and just as I always do I asked him was there anything else I could help him with – he at first said no and that he was all taken care of and then he picked up my card read my name and said, “Faith. Faith, you are very pretty.”  I said “Thanks!” as I blushed and as he nervously stammered around to pick up his car keys and papers and it hit me – this is what Eleanor Roosevelt was talking about. It was very apparent this man was not just throwing out some line – he was doing his one thing for the day that scared him. Even though it was apparent he felt as if he had just realized he had left the house without any clothes on – He got it – he understood what “embarrassing bravery” is all about.

Believe it or not, for as much as I love to talk and write – I am not one that is good at taking advantage of my “20 seconds” in real life situations. I thought that I was good at hiding this until tonight when talking to my mama and she pointed out the fact that I never talk about stuff, instead I write out my thoughts and email them to whoever they need to go to or I post a blog but it is very rare, even in these instances that I don’t talk using metaphors. I always seem to think of an example to express how I am feeling but never just say, ok – this is what is happening in my life and this is how I feel. Hmmmmm mamas always have us figured out huh?!

To me, words are one of the most powerful tools that we have in our daily life which is why I am so careful when choosing mine and so careful that I don’t say the same old things to everyone on the occasions when I do choose to reveal my thoughts. As careful, (or scared) as I am with my words this year has definitely not helped to calm any hesitations – saying “yes” to a marriage proposal, something I always thought I would only do one time in my life and then having to later go back and say, “no” has almost made me so that I am even afraid to write (as you can tell from my scarce postings) because I am worried what if I change my mind about what I said or how I feel. This is why my friend sending me this video clip was so enlightening to me – between that,  the man from my office and my 30^th birthday quickly approaching I am going to TRY to “drop my guard” so to speak. I tried this today and it felt really good - I text a friend that I will be seeing soon that I was actually looking forward to seeing them – I know this sounds silly but for anyone who knows me well, you know I am going at saying, “You too!”, “Ditto”, “OK”, “Uh huh”….etc. but I am not good at initiating those nice, simple, little comments because I don’t want you to not reciprocate and me stand there feeling embarrassed and because I do not want you to think I just say that to anyone. Baby steps people!

I am by no means saying I think that everyone should just feed me compliments constantly and I will be the happiest girl on earth – even that makes me squirm – how do I know you are as careful with your words as I am and I am not the tenth person you have given that same compliment to that day?

I don’t know this, just like I am realizing that I don’t know right now how I will feel tomorrow but I am slowly but surely grasping on to the fact that it is ok to “mess up” because chances are whether I am telling someone something or trying to believe in the sincerity of what a person is telling me, I will more than likely look back and realize that it wasn’t a “mess up” at all.
 
So this is my 30^th birthday gift to myself - I am going to work on allowing my true feelings to be expressed and I will do so with the understanding that I may look back and be so thankful that I did that or I may look back and laugh at how silly I sounded but either way I will be able to look back and know that I used many more of the  “20 seconds of insane courage and 20 seconds of embarrassing bravery” the next 30 years of my life than I did in the first!

xoxo,

Faith